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17 May 2016 @ 09:57 am
Vault of Horror  
I have suspected that I was trapped in a satirical dystopia ever since I was a small child at Harrison Bergeron Elementary School. I read Catch-22, and the next thing I knew my government was trying to draft me into it, with the additional refinement that at least the original was set in a war it made sense for us to be in. Now I find myself ensnared in the saga of a supervillain named Donald Trump.

At first I thought he was merely Guy Grand, the wealthy sociopath protagonist of Terry Southern’s The Magic Christian, who perpetrates cruel pranks to “make it hot for them,” ending with perhaps overly literalized metaphor as people attempt to dig currency out from under vast quantities of blood, urine, and feces.

Now it seems worse, as if I am trapped in a real-life reality show where the buffoon who played a successful businessman on television is attempting to be promoted to Acting President.

Or maybe it’s The Manchurian Candidate, and one of those Eastern European wives drugged and hypnotized him. It started as a diabolical Commie plot to discredit Capitalism by gaming the system so that someone with neither intelligence nor personal charm could become wealthy. (Or perhaps they didn’t have to.) Now he is poised for even greater destruction.

I always was overly optimistic, like that alleged Barry Malzberg story that was bounced from the Bacigalupi-Watts Depressing SF anthology for being too upbeat. The last dangerous vision is that somehow he is elected and Vladimir Putin hurls a familiar epithet. President Trump steps over to The Button and shows that his finger really is long enough.
(Anonymous) on May 17th, 2016 04:28 pm (UTC)
I think its more like the Wise Men of Chelm.

"Why this is Chelm, nor are we out of it."
Elenbarathi: Abandon hopeelenbarathi on May 17th, 2016 10:32 pm (UTC)
Or it's a diabolical Democrat plot to discredit the GOP by having a RINO run such an offensive 'Republican' campaign - saying straight-out all the things the GOP prefers to dog-whistle - that the Dem candidate will be sure to win.

If that's so, the plot has backfired, because the GOP base adores it that a candidate is finally saying straight-out all the things they've been "carefully taught" to believe, and that candidate is such a narcissist that he now believes he really could be President.

Maybe he can. And better Trump in 2016 than Cruz in 2020. Do you really think, if Hillary wins this election, that we won't have a Republican next time around? I'd FAR rather live in Catch-22, or even in Brazil, than in The Handmaid's Tale.

There isn't really a Button, y'know, and the POTUS cannot legally just unilaterally decide to start a nuclear war, so if Trump tried any such thing, I think he'd find his finger is not in fact long enough.

On the other hand, Hillary Clinton probably would have little trouble getting a Republican Congress to declare war on behalf of Israel with some country that would be rash enough to try and attack us on our home turf. And then the nukes could fly free. Listen to her AIPAC speech again: that woman is just itching for war.

Edited at 2016-05-17 10:34 pm (UTC)
Nation of Tire Saletdaschel on May 18th, 2016 11:45 am (UTC)
eh, according to Emperor von Tromp's Republican critics, he's running to the left of Mz Clinton on trade and foreign policy. but, really, many of those critics fall under the "neoconservative" umbrella, so are pretty much pro-war Democrats at heart ..