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26 August 2014 @ 07:46 am
Some very good points  
Love is not enough. And I must say I enjoyed the opening paragraph:
In 1967, John Lennon wrote a song called, “All You Need is Love.” He also beat both of his wives, abandoned one of his children, verbally abused his gay Jewish manager with homophobic and anti-semitic slurs, and once had a camera crew film him lying naked in his bed for an entire day.
Thanx to andrewducker
ruthling on August 26th, 2014 12:27 pm (UTC)
that's cutting and well said. I may post this to facebook later even though the person who may most need to see it won't bother.
browngirl on August 26th, 2014 03:45 pm (UTC)
Oooh, I loved that essay. As it were.
Arthur and Kevin's Nellorat: cat_green_heartsnellorat on August 26th, 2014 04:55 pm (UTC)
I think a lot about whether love is enough depends on one's definition of love. The article says, "When we believe that “all we need is love,” then like Lennon, we’re more likely to ignore fundamental values such as respect, humility and commitment towards the people we care about."

But to me, without all of those and more it's not love. I know you've used the term limerance from one book; I guess I'd call the feeling alone, without those aspects, a crush on someone, not love.

Reading about the importance of shaping and nurturing a relationship, I realized that my views are somewhat shaped by hearing somewhat-positive things, as I grew up, about pioneer marriages in the days of my great grandmother and her parents: you weren't expected to start out loving each other, because that was something you were expected to build by facing life together. That's given me an overly rosy view of the situation, but it's been good in how it influenced my view that even in a chosen relationship, the decision to be together is just the beginning.
kaffyr: Komarrkaffyr on August 27th, 2014 02:08 am (UTC)
What she said.